Being Sheep

"I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me— just as the Father knows me and I know the Father—and I lay down my life for the sheep."John 10:14-15

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Normal

Please don't tell me his behavior is normal.

It's not.

I have quite a few adoption experts who will tell you it's not.

I have a therapist who knows my son and agrees completely that it's not normal.

Please,

when I share that we've had a rough day

don't tell me that all two year olds have rough days

as though I didn't know.

Please don't tell me that all two year olds throw temper tantrums.

Believe me,

I know.

I know that all two year olds want Mommy's attention.

A lot of it.


You don't see the reason behind the tantrums

the cause for his screaming when I walk out of the room.

His fear of abandonment.

His fear that if he doesn't stay in complete control

his world will come crashing down.


You don't see him hug and love everyone else

but refuse to hug his own mom.

Or scream literally

all.

day.

long.

You don't see him hug, kiss, and cuddle

and then hit Mom in the face

because he is afraid

of real attachment.


You don't see his anxiety,

his fear.


And it's okay that you don't see it

It's not your job to see it.

It's my job.


But please don't doubt my words.

For when you tell me his behavior is normal

After I've opened up to share

I feel I have no support.

At all.

3 comments:

  1. Great advice for friends and family! Our son does not have an attachment disorder, but we did a lot of preparation/research in case he did, so I know you are RIGHT ON. Keep educating people, even when it hurts. You are a wonderful mommy and your little one WILL see healing one day.

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  2. Thanks, Shannon. :) We've definitely already seen a lot of healing, but still have a long way to go, ya know? Are you guys getting any sleep over there?

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  3. Your words ring true in so many ways. You get a hug next time I see you.

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